Saturday, January 23, 2010

Praying for Coleo...

if you know us and love us, will you please hold our son Coleo up in prayer?

In a nutshell, school is and has been a miserable, miserable place for him to spend 35 hours of his life every week.  Beginning in 6th grade, he has struggled with the social side of the hell otherwise known as middle school.

On a "good" day, he simply feels like he doesn't have any friends and is ok with that.

On a bad day, he feels completely alone and ostracized.

On a terrible, horrible, no good, really bad day, girls tell him he stinks, he's a freak and no girl will ever like him. Kids ask to have him moved off their team in Phy Ed (and the stupid substitute teacher actually does it) or he is blamed and taunted for making the snare section in band sound bad (when in all reality he could probably kick some serious trash against any of them).  The mama bear in me gets all riled up just thinking about it.

Up until now, he has been resigned to feeling alone. And I always answered the question "how is school going for Coleo?" with the answer that "socially it's been pretty tough, but academically he's doing great."

Until now.

We just learned that he is is getting C's across the board, and actually failing his acclerated math class.  It's being recommended that he drop back down to the grade level math class for next semester.

um....yeah. sure.  cuz THAT'S not going to knock him to his knees emotionally.

The kicker is we had no warning until the email arrived today (at 4pm on a Friday no less)  from the "gifted specialist".  Not one single ounce of communication from his math teacher or anyone else, that our son had failed two chapter tests and a couple of quizzes.   It's partly our fault for not checking in with the grade tracker website on a more regular basis. But if *I* were a math teacher, and a kid who HAD been doing ok, all of a sudden dropped quiz and test scores, I'd like to think that I would make some effort to touch base with the parents; wouldn't you??    So yeah, we are pretty pissed off and frustrated and sad about it all.

It means making the kinds of phone calls on Monday that raise my anxiety level to the roof.   I hate making calls for something as simple as dentist appts, so this kind of intervening/confrontational junk is just not my cup of tea at all, even for my kids. I tend to cry instead of being calm and assertive and confidant.   It's what I fear and dislike the most about this parenting thing.

So if you know us and love us, please pray for our son.  First and foremost, he needs to know we love him, and that lots and lots of you love him too.  Second, he
desperately needs a friend at school.   Lord, we need someone to come out of the woodwork who loves You, to stick up for him and reach out to him so he knows he's not the freak that he's told he is everyday. To see him for the talented, witty, creative and all around good kid that he is.   And please pray for courage and wisdom for me and Greg as we wade through this mess and try to do right by our son. 


Wendy said...

I'm praying Karyn. As someone who was often treated cruelly at school I can understand how degrading these behaviors are. Keep reminding him that this is a snipit of life... it won't always be this way... I can attest to that.

Anonymous said...


I'm just seeing your post now. I'll be praying for your oldest son - and for you as you navigate this tough, tough road with him as parents.

I remember how terribe, awful and horrendous jr. high was (and didn't really have church friends either). Sr. high - in contrast - was wonderful. I actually had a couple people apologize how they had treated me. I will pray that your son has the same gratifying experience (soon!!). Glad that things worked out with his teachers!



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