Monday, June 18, 2012

I wonder, as I wander...

while sitting at Caribou coffee (instead of grocery shopping like I should be) I wonder... 

what is it that makes a coffee shop so magical - how it is that simply walking thru the door can make all the chaos of your day simply fade away. Even if it's just for a moment.

while hitting the road for the third time today to deliver/pick up one of my children from some activity....I wonder how it is that a mom can be so willing to do and sacrifice so much.  And how can it be that it seems they appreciate so little.   

while sitting at my computer having a short FB message chat with an old friend, I wonder... how can I possibly answer his question "how's your heart?"  truthfully,  knowing I have so little time.   Right now, that kind of question would require hours over coffee...and he and his lovely wife and family live 20 hours away in Utah. I pray for the opportunity to sit over coffee (or beer) together with them someday soon. (in case you're wondering...I told him my heart is good.  But really my heart is weary and my head is filled with schedules and logistics and I wonder how I can possibly sustain this for the rest of the summer when I am already tired 6 days in?)

and I wonder, while praying for my son and his fellow "missionaries" serving the hungriest and homeless in our nations's capital (how can that be?? another blog post all it's own perhaps)...I wonder, how can I do right by him, help him understand what it means to truly follow Jesus, be like Jesus....when often times I look and act like *I* don't? 

I wonder about the power of friendships, the impact of relationships, why they are are so hard, require so much to foster and develop, how crummy of a job I do sometimes.  But I am trying.  I am grateful. 

And right now, as I sit here and edit and re-read, and tweak this post at 6:30pm on a Monday, I wonder, what on earth am I making for dinner?  That's the $100,000 question here in the Hinterland most days, esp in the summer when the mere thought of turning on the oven on a 90 degree day makes me break out in a sweat.   I wonder how we could work it to afford to just eat out most nights...or hire a cook? 

I wander.

I wonder.

And then I seem to wander some more. 

What do you wander and wonder about?  


Christine Pennington said...

looks like we both are thinking about friends, friendships etc. i wonder if any of the ladies or gents in my life are really friends or not. i know how my heart feels about each and every one of them--but i don't feel loved by them. why is that? is it my insecurities again? or am i just unlovable like many have told me over the years.

lizzi was here! said...

Carpe' Diem!! I am so super excited to see you step off the edge & share your ramblings with the world! You are an amazing women gutting it out in the world we live in. You fight for family values & keeping everyone close to Jesus. You fight to carve out a niche for yourself in the eb & flow of your life. But more importantly, you shared your vulnerability. And through that your spirit is renewed! It sustains you until the next cup of coffee. Keep gifting the world with you! Because you are in my eyes remarkable, amazing & determined to live by your convictions despite the distractions of humanity. I think I'll distract from the To-Do List & have a cup of coffee today. And I'll wander & wonder. Thanks for the gentle reminder that distraction is sometimes necessary & vital to daily survival!

Jen C. said...

Here's some of my wonderings & wanderings...anything from how do hummingbirds find a new feeder within 2 hours and why did a moth decided to lay her eggs on my just washed front door why our stray/adopted/outdoor kitty has left and where has he gone and is he even still what am I supposed to be doing with my will I ever see certain people again?


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